honestly, don't know whats next for me.

i feel like everything is falling apart, again, worse then ever

and im trying to be strong, trying to find reasons to smile.

but every time i find a reason to smile something else happens.

its like, eventually all things good will be gone and what would be the point living?

living would be the deffinition of hell.

i dont want this life anymore, i want a new one.

i would drop everything for someone if they needed me but i cant think of anyone who would do that for me and thats sad.

i dont know how long i can go on pretending everything is okay.